"Life did not intend to make us perfect. Whoever is perfect belongs in a museum." - Erich Maria Remarque

Happy New Year! As we begin another year together, in our lives at work, and in the vital relationships that bring meaning to our lives, I hope our holidays have been very happy, and given us each a little time to reflect on what has been working during the past year, where we need to grow and change, and what really matters in our lives. While January 1 is simply the day that follow December 31, we can make it an opportunity to recommit ourselves to being the best people we can be, at work, in our communities, for our loved ones, and for ourselves.

For me, this time just after the joyful, and busy, celebrations of the holidays is a special quiet time. A time that renews me like meditation. I enjoy the feeling of peaceful stillness before the new year takes off again and I find that, just as when I open my eyes after meditating, everything looks brighter, and I can engage in all my activities with greater energy and clarity. It as if the world takes a cleansing breath, holds it for one quiet moment of peace, and breathes out gently as we move forward together into another circle ‘round the sun.

Today, I find myself reflecting on our not being perfect and remembering that our differences in approach, thinking, personality, and perspective are strengths for the teams that we participate in and lead. None of us is perfect. Every one of us is a work in progress. Each of us makes mistakes. We each have flaws and frailties that we will never completely overcome. We may look in the mirror and perceive flaws in the image looking back. Some will frown at gray hairs and wrinkles, others will grimace at a too-youthful face that they fear is not taken seriously. We may see a reflection that we think is too fat, or too thin. We may ask whether others judge us based on our gender, age, race, disability, or other aspects of our reflection. One of our frailties may be that we allow trivial things to matter to us. One of the flaws we must all work together to correct is the very real discrimination, based on differences that do not affect our value, that still affects how we treat one another.

When we look beyond the mirror, and into ourselves, we may see more significant flaws that we work to overcome. We may struggle with our tempers, recognize prejudice within ourselves, see that we are too hasty and impatient, or too cautious and averse to risks. We may be reticent to share our thoughts or feelings, or feel that we share too much. While my own belief is that there is no wrong thought or feeling, only wrong behavior, at times it may require great effort to act only on our best impulses. Sometimes, it is hard to know which course of action is truly best.To some extent we may grow to overcome our flaws but we will probably always have to work to accept, compensate and make amends for our imperfections.

Instead of devaluing each other based on perceived differences, of appearance, belief, or personality, we must work to value each other for the ways our differences make us stronger together. When we celebrate and embrace our diversity, and engage with one another open to hearing, seeing, thinking and feeling the new things others have to share, together we can be far more capable than we are alone. Each of us will be strong where others are weak, bold where others are timid, prudent where others are rash. The collective scope and value of our perspectives, ideas, and feelings will be far greater than any one of us can contribute alone.

Some of our flaws may be hard for us to see. I am far from perfect and one of the flaws that was hardest for me to recognize is that I can be too positive. I am an optimist by birth and friends have said that my glass is neither half-full or half-empty, but overflowing. While I have long recognized this can tend to make me believe it will be easier to accomplish things than is realistic, it was only when I sat with the Nominating Committee for the SHARE Board of Directors some years ago that I realized it could have a negative effect on how others perceive me. Asked about my greatest strength, and my greatest weakness, I responded that in both cases, this was my optimism and I had a good rationale for that answer. A member of the committee for whom I have great respect gently commented that there were times I was so positive that it might be hard for some people to believe that I was “for real”.

Most recently, my wife helped me see how my tendency to emphasize the positive can be an issue. Being a very positive guy, I often tell her how wonderful she is and compliment her in various ways. I made one of those typical positive remarks and she, gently, told me that sometimes she wonders if I see her clearly and know who she really is. My compliments made her wonder if I saw her as a complete human being including her faults. Fortunately, we’ve always been pretty good at communicating and this gave us a chance to talk and for me to reassure her that I see how she is not perfect; in her appearance and in her behavior. I see the gray hairs, she does irritate or annoy me at times, and still she is beautiful and wonderful to me, and I love her as the complete, imperfect, person she is. This has lead to some great, and funny, moments when one of us gently points out something about the other that isn’t perfect and we have a good laugh together. I think it has brought us even closer.

Of course, I’ve always known she isn’t perfect but I haven’t tended to say much about her imperfect points and do tend to be pretty demonstrative and vocal about what I like and love about her. This has been a good learning opportunity for me! I know that I’m this way in general, not just with her, and that it extends to my behavior in the workplace. While I don’t plan to become particularly critical, especially of my loved ones, it could be that people won’t trust the positive things I have to say as much when they aren’t part of what seems a more realistic understanding of them as complete, imperfect, human beings.

Relevant to what I’m writing about today, this particular imperfection of mine could make it hard for me to help the teams I lead to make the most of their diversity. There may be times when it is hard for team members to trust that I am “for real” when I talk about their positive attributes and the things I believe we can accomplish. I need to remember to be open and share clearly the imperfections I see and the challenges we face. When I emphasize the positive in counseling and coaching, I may also fail to address tough issues effectively. I’ll be working with my new team members to address areas where they need to improve, or change problem behaviors, as well as those where we can develop and feature their unique strengths.

I find myself wondering what other ways we may discourage members of our teams from bringing their best unique ideas and perspectives to bear? Are we sustaining cultures where some are expected to conform to outdated norms, others are allowed to engage in dysfunctional behavior, or there is an inappropriate hierarchy that leaves potential contributors in a less-than relationship to others? As we work to remove barriers to success, what can we do to embrace and encourage diversity and innovation? Are we providing the incentives, and flexibility, that encourage innovation and rewarding those who have the courage to think differently? We say we want people to think outside the box. What are we doing to challenge the nature of the box itself?

When you look at your workplace, and the culture of your organization, what do you see? How can you help your teams, and team members, be their imperfect best? When you look at how you, and other leaders, engage with your colleagues, what changes do you think you need to embrace? There are some good examples of practices that major IT organizations are using to encourage innovation. Google is well known for their efforts in this area. Recently, they have applied their 20% time model to encourage greater innovation in diversity. I’m sure other IT organizations, whether in IT companies or other industries, could benefit from their example. For more information, please see: http://www.insightintodiversity.com/google-encourages-employees-to-spend-one-fifth-of-time-focused-on-innovation-in-diversity/

As we begin this new year together, may you all find that 2016 brings you challenges that help you grow, accomplishments that bring your great satisfaction, opportunities to appreciate each other in new ways and to contribute together in your communities, and, especially, time to relax, explore the amazing world we share, and grow closer to your loved ones. I wish you all a very Happy New Year, indeed!