“A nation divided against itself cannot stand.” - Abraham Lincoln

Today, I am thinking about the rising feeling of division here in the U.S. as our election season continues. I don’t intend to write about political parties here or to support, or oppose, any candidate and I will mention no candidates by name. I will do that kind of writing elsewhere. In this essay, I write about how letting ourselves be divided by false distinctions is destructive to progress and how coming together with respect for our legitimate differences will always lead to better outcomes. I believe this applies to all candidates, parties, and leaders, and to all of us.

I believe this is true across the full spectrum of human interaction from the most intimate personal connections, to our relationships with our family and loved ones, our engagement with colleagues in the workplace, efforts within our communities, and responsibilities as citizens of our nations and the world. I believe this principle holds true for the relations between nations, cultures, genders, races, religions and groups of all kinds, and our relationship as a species with the other creatures that inhabit our world and the environment we share.

Certainly, we do have legitimate differences. We are of different genders, sexual orientations, races, ethnicities and cultures. We hold different religious beliefs and our values may lead us to pursue our desire to do what is right in different ways. We speak different languages, are of different ages and life experiences, and have different abilities. We have come from, and live in, different places, and we have a wide range of personalities and personal preferences.

Sometimes, these differences can contribute to our disagreeing about important things. Where we recognize these legitimate differences I believe we are best served by coming together with respect, and open minds, to explore them together. We may find ways to build bridges between us and establish common ground. At times, it will be necessary within our nation, or within the community of nations, to pursue policies designed to correct injustice and we must act with courage and conviction to achieve that objective. Even then, we must seek to remain engaged with those who disagree. Where we must continue to disagree, I hope we can do this with mutual respect and without building walls between us. If we must have walls, even in our minds, may they include windows so that our disagreements are enlightened by our different views. May they have open doors so that the option of revisiting our differences with respect also remains open.

While we do have legitimate differences, I believe there is far more that we have in common. When researchers have looked at some fundamental differences, like gender and race, they find much more evidence for our similarities than our differences. In each of these cases, and many other ways that we differ, the differences between individuals is far greater than any difference between the groups as a whole.

Certainly, there are social and cultural differences in how people experience race, ethnicity, and gender, for example, and in how we treat one another based on belonging to different groups. I contend that much of this difference in treatment is based on false distinctions and that it is appropriate that we work to replace these with real understanding. I also believe that, while there may be significant differences between cultures in how we act on our beliefs, we share very similar underlying values. My review of different religious teachings provides one example where this is clearly true.

It seems clear to me that the vast majority of us share concerns about poverty, crime, violence, harassment, discrimination and intimidation. We share a belief in wanting the best for our children and loved ones, in the importance of liberty, education, integrity, civility, equity, respect, ethical behavior, and addressing the needs of those who are disabled, ill, or threatened. I am confident that most of us value a safe and healthy environment.

I believe we essentially agree about what is fundamentally important and, in the U.S., we participate in a government based on key principles aligned with these values. Our nation was founded on the basis that all are “created equal”, have “certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Happiness” and that governments are instituted to secure these rights. The intent of our constitution, “to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence, promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity”, is clearly consistent with these goals.

While I believe we agree on what is important, I also recognize that we do not always agree on how these important values should be upheld. We differ with regard to the role of governmental, religious, community, and charitable organizations. We may disagree more often about how to solve these problems and respond to these vital needs. Because we are bound to disagree, it is vitally important that we find a way to do so effectively. I believe we must work to understand each other, our beliefs and opinions, so that we focus on legitimate differences and not false distinctions.

When we approach others with disregard, or disrespect, for our legitimate differences, we damage our ability to work together. Unnecessary conflict, and a lack of respectful, civil, engagement as we explore our apparent disagreements, hinders our progress in support of our shared values and goals. Far worse is allowing ourselves to fall victim to false distinctions. When we stand opposed to one another because of differences between us that either do not actually exist, or that are not significant to the things we truly value, we lose the opportunity to work together to achieve our common objectives.

Allowing others, especially those who would claim a position of leadership, to play on our fears, and divide us, by exploiting such false distinctions is tragic. The behavior of those who would divide us in this way is disgraceful and has no place in our public life as a nation. We must reject it and those who attempt use us in this way. Their behavior corrupts the vital public dialog about important issues that is essential to the continuing health of our nation. We must reject those who say to us “You must support me because we are different from them” and instead choose leaders who seek our support because we believe the ideas they propose will be better for all of us.

I’ve touched on aspects of diversity in a number of these essays. In the workplace, I believe the ways that we are different can make us stronger. I think the same is true for couples, families, friends, and larger groups including nations. Instead of respecting our differences and helping us grow stronger together, today some are using false distinctions in an effort to inflame hatred, divide us, and gain political support. I hope we can not only reject hate but grow past it to recognize that there is so much more we share than there is that divides us. We must learn to disagree civilly again so we can best move forward together as a nation. I hope you will join me in rejecting hate in all forms including its use as a political tool.